Asexual means that you do not experience sexual attraction.

That's it. That's the definition.

It does not say anything about your relationship to the act of sex itself.

It does not say anything about where your boundaries are.

It only says that you do not experience sexual attraction.

I find that a lot of people struggle with this. Some of whom are asexual themselves. They think saying "I am asexual" is enough communication, or try to deny the asexuality of people who have—or enjoy—sex but don't experience sexual attraction.

On the flip side, I think a lot of allosexuals (non-asexuals), struggle with this even in relationships where the asexual partner is willing to have sex. Because part of what they want and feel validated by is _their partner finding them sexually attractive_. The actual sex is not as important to them as that feeling that their _partner_ finds them sexually attractive.