Hmmm… on a post of my own, using GoToSocial, I see "1 visible reply; 1 more reply hidden or not public". Somebody replied to a post of mine, didn't mention me (presumably mentioned other people?), with visibility set to followers-only and I don't follow them? How strange.
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@alex I'm not sure how to articulate this correctly, but if something was sent as a reply to your notes, you should be able to look at the /replies collection of that note and access it, despite not being addressed to you specifically. Your user *owns* that reply collection, and you have all the rights to operate on it in any way you see fit.
I think following the mastodon model too closely, prevents developers from just doing the right thing. :(
This being self-hosted, I guess I could just log into the server and take a look at the database to see what's going on. But that's creepy.