Like half the men I've worked with have done something sexist, and most of those guys were usually cool
most of the time it was something when they were already mentally taxed and not something they'd have done if they weren't distracted (ie, they're behind schedule, someone needs to take notes from meeting. Make the only woman engineer take notes without examining why they thought that's who should have to take notes, proceed to worry about 5 unrelated things)
It's a UX issue, not a user issue
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@Xibanya I've once asked the only woman colleague for advice on color cause she's a woman. I was rightfully scolded 😅
calling men who commit micro-aggressions sexist is like telling people to stop climate change by using paper straws. In the case of the classic "talk over woman during meeting" and similar, calling some tired out guy who fell back on the shitty behavioral script programmed into him from childhood a sexist and shunning him does nothing. Excusing it does nothing. Instead, make systems in which the easiest choice for someone who is tired and distracted is one that isn't sexist
lol I have also seen the dreaded "ask senior female engineer to make coffee", and each time it wasn't some alpha male power play, it was a breathtakingly stupid move by a guy who hadn't had his coffee yet. okay so his subconscious brain thinks women should do domestic labor. he probably is in denial about it because his conscious brain knows that's bad. Make the easiest action be to not ask a woman to make coffee by havin one of them fancy coffee machines with buttons n shit
One of the more disturbing instances of sexism I saw was in enterprise when team was interviewing a bunch of senior SWEs. Late in the interview proceess team takes candidate to lunch to assess "culture fit" When I interviewed, because im a turbonerd I aced the "culture fit" test. A SWE I worked with at another job interviewed and I knew her skills were just what the team needed.
I overheard managers talking about it. She aced whiteboard, tech round, etc
"ugh but she's just such a mom"
@Xibanya I've been that woman, over and over again, throughout my career.
I no longer work for other people in tech.
I'd had enough of the condescension, abuse, and bullshit.
I still code, at times, but only for my own projects. I don't see myself willing to put up with the door-fee for being a woman in tech.
They didn't like her because at lunch she admitted she had no idea what the latest video games or sci fi/fantasy TV shows were because she had two young children so she is saturated in kids media.
because of that they passed on her and hired some jackass who vaped all the time in our cramped open office and made the place reek of chemical vape flavor
managers had not the slightest clue they were Doing A Sexism. Looking for "culture fit" is a policy which leads to sexist outcomes
@Xibanya #patriarchy